This is the third video in this series. In this video I will be helping put different perspective on how you react so you can understand it more and start to change it to a more effective response.
If you treated others the way you treat yourself, how would it impact them?
Here we will look at the real impact of your response, you may think you realise what this is, but it really helps to take another look.
If you are interested, I’m running a workshop next week, 4th May 2022 at 12pm. You can either email me to let me know you want to come, and I’ll send you the link, or you can find the link in the Facebook event:
This is the third video in this series. In this video I will be helping put different perspective on how you react so you can understand it more and start to change it to a more effective response.
Blog Transcript
Hi I’m Hattie Voelcker from Find Your True Voice and I’ve been talking for the last few weeks about dealing with making mistakes when you’re performing, such as the mistake I just made and the first week we looked at how you respond when you make a mistake, the second week we looked at the reason you respond that way, what you hope to achieve either either consciously or subconsciously by treating yourself that way and today we’re going to look at challenging that subconscious or conscious belief or assumption.
So have a think back to last week and what you subconsciously might believe is the reason you know what you are achieving by treating yourself that way. So for example if you’re somebody who naturally beats yourself up is there somewhere in there a belief that it’s by treating yourself harshly when you make a mistake that you’ll pull your socks up and get it sorted and do better next time and that may be something that’s come from parents childhood of some variety school somewhere along the line. If you tend to give up, don’t worry, is that subconsciously or consciously trying to protect yourself from putting yourself out there?
If you’re blaming other people is that protecting you from that uncomfortable feeling that it might be your fault and one of the easiest ways to check in with whether it actually achieves what your subconscious or conscious beliefs it might achieve for you is to ask yourself would you treat a friend that way when they make a mistake and then ask yourself what is the reason you wouldn’t treat them that way?
Do you think it would be effective? What impact might it have on their self-esteem, on their ability to go out there and put themselves out there again, on their ability to practice more effectively. Yes they might not be your friend again if we treat them the way we treat ourselves but more than that would it achieve what we ultimately want for them? To improve and get better and feel more confident and comfortable when they’re performing.
So have a think about that. Feel free to comment about that if you’re watching this in youtube or to email me about it. I’d love to know what you think about it. I’m Hattie Voelcker, thank you so much for listening.
Have a lovely day.
Much love
